Online dating expectations

03 Mar

“I would tell them to accept the fact that they have to make the first move.

There are women who won’t respond, and that’s okay." Introverts will meet all kinds of people as a result of online dating, both introverts and extroverts.

“Most of the fears that people have, that fear is over as quickly as they do it," she said.

"They’re afraid that everybody sees them, and then they realize that nobody sees them.

"It’s a way of fulfilling sentimental human need for connection and romance without having to put yourself through a very unpleasant process of going to singles bars and things like that," Cain told , Cain writes about the "self-negating choices" introverts make when they feel the pressure to identify themselves as outgoing.

Hartman said that this is a choice she sees introverts make in their online dating profiles.

Likewise, niche dating websites, such as those for book lovers and science fiction nerds, are appealing though not as well-populated.

Many introverts experience an initial hesitancy to sign up for an online dating website, but Hartman says that discomfort goes away quickly.

As annoying that is, you’re not being exposed in a negative way.” Cain said that having a focus on the positive aspects of online dating can help overcome hurdles.

"I would embrace it and see the beauty of it that you can sit at home curled up on your sofa and look for someone who feels like a real connection for you.” “It’s easier to ask somebody out online than in person," Cain said.

Still, introverts, especially men, who Hartman and Cain agreed face different expectations than women, may find it difficult to ask out someone they've been messaging.

"That’s a lot to ask for someone who’s introverted, especially in an area already outside of his comfort zone," Hartman said.